Bhool Bhulaiyaa 3 review: Kartik Aaryan's film is neither funny nor scary

: Anees Bazmee

: Kartik Aaryan, Tripti Dimri, Vidya Balan, Madhuri Dixit Nene

: 2 stars

Before we dive into the review of this... well... film, please stand by for a little rant. 2024 has been tough for mainstream Hindi cinema where the box office is as empty as the plot holes in half the movies. As for quality? Let’s just say it’s been as scarce as believable CGI. Even the year’s biggest hit, , had quite a few flaws. The reason for the critical and commercial decline of Bollywood can, arguably, be whittled down to one word - franchise. is a franchise and so is this big fat Diwali release we are about to discuss.

Franchises in cinema are like fast-food chains: the original might have been a hit, but the spin-offs keep arriving with fewer nutrients and more filler. Creative storytelling? Common sense? Gone faster than a ghost! When a movie takes the franchise route, it’s the brand manager calling the shots, not a filmmaker, and the difference shows.

, starring Kartik Aaryan, Vidya Balan, Madhuri Dixit and Tripti Dimrii, is the perfect example. Can this be called a film? Nah! It’s a project, hurriedly crafted by someone who was told by his boss to jump on to a gravy train called ‘horror comedy’ and churn out the third installment to an unnecessary second part of a decade-old copy of a classic original (confused? We’ll explain later).

A film needs essentials: plot, characters, clever writing, a decent background score, good cinematography... and—oh, right—some logic. In the absence of these, at the very least, it should be all about “entertainment, entertainment, entertainment” to quote a zinger from one of Balan’s better films. But ? It has none of it. Zilch.

Of course, this deep reflection really does not matter because fans have already given the movie a bumper response during the opening weekend. But for the sake of cinematic criticism, here’s an honest appraisal.

Aaryan returns as Ruhaan or Rooh Baba, a charmer with a winning smile who cons people pretending to be an exorcist. Meera (Dimrii), a pretty young woman with royal roots, hires him to get rid of a spirit from an old palace so that its poverty-stricken inhabitants, descendants of a Bengali king, can sell it off and make some money. No prizes for guessing who the ghoul is - Manjulika, made famous by Akshay Kumar’s 2007 hit .

Ruhaan does his tomfoolery and begins a sudden romance with Meera, but then two ladies enter, Vidya Balan and Madhuri Dixit. Either of them could be the apparition making life hell for residents with each having her own motives and reincarnation stories. So who is the real Manjulika? Does it matter? Do you care? By the end of it, I certainly didn’t despite resolving to keep my questioning mind aside.

This is that kind of film where random songs appear only to make the ‘hero-heroine’ dance in exotic locations. Humour means mining a person with dwarfism for laughter. And horror is all about loud - really loud - jumpscares accompanying a figure wearing a terrible mask. Weird plot twists include a murdered brother, an evil roaming spirit, a priest, a magic potion, terribly rendered CGI bats and pigeons and a whole lot of jarring VFX. Is the movie also a fantasy along with it being a thriller, horror and comedy? Again, do you care?

Comparing to the 2007 film or even its 2022 sequel is futile. The only things it lifts from its predecessors are the title and the ghost’s name. The project manager, in this case, has let his or her imagination run wild churning out a story so silly, puerile and banal that watching paint peel sounds more appealing than enduring this alleged comedy.

Of course, the film is sprinkled with scenes that supposedly aim to make you laugh. So, if Rajpal Yadav proudly announcing he arrived in a “Rolls Royce,” only for us to realise that Rolls and Royce are actually the names of two bullocks pulling a rickety cart, sounds like your kind of humour... then, by all means, book your ticket ASAP.

The writing and screenplay are lazy, as if director Anees Bazmee and producer T-series were sure that just the name of the…er... franchise is enough to draw in the audience. Their assumption might be right but what must be the motive of the actors?

Aaryan is the star of the show but Dimrii is merely a glam doll - the way she has been portrayed in her last few films. And what were Vidya Balan and Madhuri Dixit thinking before they greelit this venture? The ladies try to act mysterious and scary, making faces and screaming ‘aami Monjulika’ at the top of their voices but it all falls flat in the absence of a coherent, sensible plot or direction. It’s also sad to see fine actors like Vijay Raaz, Ashwini Kalsekar, Rajesh Sharma, Rajpal Yadav and the wonderful Sanjay Mishra being reduced to slapstick caricatures.

One can’t help but also wonder what a certain Mr. Fazil must think of . For the uninitiated, Fazil is an acclaimed Malayalam director who helmed the 1993 blockbuster — a film so compelling it was remade several times with Bollywood delivering a scene-by-scene copy in 2007 - . stands out as a rare script that seamlessly weaves scientific thinking with folklore, mythology and mental health. With every remake and re-telling this classic seems to be taking an unfortunate step backward. And worse, nobody seems to mind it.

Seriously, Bollywood should rest Manjulika forever! And we, the poor suffering film buffs, deserve a better Diwali and a more palatable ghost story!